Sunday, August 31, 2008

Day 73: Praying 'Bout Whether

Whether Gus'll leaves us alone.
Whether I'm gonna be able to do businesses in the days to come soon.
Wether we're gonna need all these bat-trees and fans and such... (tv said sumpin 'bout steering currents and other things I don't know a darn thing 'bout).

Whether everyone will be safe, in this house and ever where else.

As I lay me down to nap... I pray so. I do.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Day 72:Official Start To Golden Retriever's Labor Day!

Labor Day.... Holidays never meant that much to me before, but WOOOWOOOWHOOO in the here and now!

The Mom's taken some vacation days from her labor, in order to labor 'round here... you know... rubbin' my back as I work on my blog and my MASTERcenterpiece for the Golden Retriever Gala!

Life is good at Casa de Lucas!

(I know she saw my kin today. She better not have let any of my secrets slip!)

Friday, August 29, 2008

Day 71: A Golden Retriever's Thoughts On A Hurricane

A boy from Waco, such as myself, got no real concept of what a hurricane is. Till now, I just thought of it as a tourist attraction... another way the hometown filled her hotels!

I'm gettin' that things are different 'round these parts, so I'm watchin' and bservin'...

Here's what I know, for now...

Hurricanes mean... Lots-o lists and incomin' stuff:

loaves of bread
food that don't need heatin'
junk food for mental health
bat-tree operated fans
toilet paper
pro-pane (whatever that is)

So far, I like hurricanes! Guess I'll know more by the END of this "holiday" weekend. Stay tuned!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Day 66: Spa Day!

I always wake up happy and hopeful about the day ahead of me... but never would I have guessed that such a special treat was in store... SPA DAY... at MR. T'S BOUTIQUE!

I'm winding down from my big day, but I couldn't go to bed without giving you the highlights...

  1. Happy to take a road trip!!!
  2. Even happier when the trolley veered off the path to Doc Banks' place!
  3. Destination: Mr. T's Boutique and Day Spa! I rank it Four Paws Belly Up!
  4. Felt the love right away. Great to see Aunt Madison, Uncle Tom and ALL their kids (and grandkid)!
  5. Pure unadulterated ROMP!
  6. Mom says I need to apologize for the 'tude. I guess growlin' in a social environment is considered an indiscretion. I sowwy!
  7. And I'd be remiss without apologizing for my second indiscretion... but I got this unwritten Golden Rule about "going" as far away from as possible! Sowwy!
  8. Romp and mischief aside, don't think for a moment that I didn't keep one eye on the Mom! She tried to slip out and get her camera, my towels and brush... I beat her to the door! (So very sorry we didn't get photos though!).
  9. BAAAAAAAFF!... Can't beat Mr. T's technique (which includes soothing conversation), nor the break he offers between the wash and rinse cycles!
  10. And what better way to top off da baff... I had Aunt Madison brushin' me while the Mom blotted the wets! Took a long time for fruition, but maybe I AM a special boy!
  11. Sniffed down the whole house, strictly for investigative purposes. Noone but the pair-of-noid Mom seemed remotely concerned. Ain't sayin' whether I was a good boy or not, but I'll testify to the fact that my extended kin can keep a good secret if I wasn't!
  12. Joined my welcomin' cousins... truly a friendly herd... and laid 'round the table of good smellin' foods. Let the Mom break bread, and I basked in the sounds of pleasant conversation and laughter.
  13. Could read the Mom's mind and did not beg. She gave me props later!
  14. The perfect Apres Spa: Nap on the cool brick floors!

Today set a high mark for the week. I'M LOVIN' THE SECOND LIFE!

Friday, August 22, 2008

Day 64: Goldens Rule

Ole Cool Hand is always thinkin', figurin', formulatin' and rankin'... Then I got this idea from someone special!

Someone's gotta speak out on behalf of the Great Golden Retriever mind, and I figure it might as well be me! So, here's my first Golden Rule:


Start with thunder and rain free Friday.

Add catching a frog at 5am... and being awake (and smart) enough to spit it out and watch it hop away.

Add a tasty breakfast. Okay, I have that everyday any way... but its a portant part of my food triangle.

Subtract Mom going to the factory for half a day.

Add back in the hamburger she brings home each Friday for us to share.

Subtract peoples calling her on the phone and other ways she's distracted (with the exception of
JDY... we both love JDY! I like that he sees things through his Maggie's eyes!)

Add back in the cool air we had blowin' before the $530 windmill bill hit the mailbox.

Subtract the yard guy workin' in the back yard, while I'm stuck in here.

Add back in a neatly groomed back yard.

Subtract the attention to my bald patooty.

And for Dog's sake, add hair back to my rear end!!!

Day 64: FRISKY!

That's how a Friday without thunder makes me feel!

  1. I got my yard cleaned up!

  2. Wallered on me some grass cologne!

  3. Ran me some figure 8's! (Training for the Limpics!)

  4. Hopped on the bed uninvited several times... then dropped my front legs, leaving my rear end high and my tail wagging. Ain't gonna get kicked off looking that cute!

  5. Went out. Came in. Went out. Came in. Went out. Came in... You get the picture.

  6. Chased me some squirrels. Slowed down so I didn't catch em.

All in all, on the Cool Hand Scale, I give this day FOUR PAWS!

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Day 63: Random Thoughts

Now that I'm out of my cape, I was pondering...

  1. Thought I would be happy to have Mom home, but she brought hell-a-shus thunder with her.

  2. Never played dress-up before. Kinda fun, but why must we do it when a storm approaches?

  3. Playing superhero in the bathroom is distracting to my fear.

  4. Pretty crafty of Mom to lure me out of my hiding place with treats. Guess I love treats more than I am afeared of storms.

  5. I'll bet I wouldn't have to poop in a swamp if I still lived with Aunt Melinda.

  6. Bet the sun is still shining at her place, too.

  7. Note to self: Check trolley schedule.

P.S. That snot snot all mine. And don't make the mistake I did by suggesting Mom clean the glass... Nobody taught me how to comfort a crying Mama.

Day 63: The Trolley Returns

Trolley is back on it's wheels, and the cool airs are blowing... in the trolley, anyway.

Now, can someone fix this whether?

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Day 62: Oops I Did It Again (Again)!

I knew Mom was coming home for lunch to check on me (how? she told me, of course), but she got here a little earlier than I was expecting. I was intending to craft a patooty toupee from the hair puffs behind the bedroom door. But she caught me red patootied.

And I guess flinging myself against the door (give me credit... only after a hellacious thunderous storm) when she tried to go back to work didn't help matters. Said she guessed I wouldn't be happy till I didn't have a hair on my ass and my mom was unemployed.

I wanted to tell her I would have a furry ass if she was unemployed, but I thought better of it. You see, if I'm to believe what I've been told... the factory puts the food in my bowl (I could have sworn it was Mom, but I guess I'm wrong), holds this not fancy but storm resistant roof up and keeps what cool airs we still got blowing... blowing. So I shushed myself before I could re-butt.

None of that stopped me from hurling every ounce of fight I had in me, as well as a patooty load of guilt upon that door as she tried to go back to the factory after our TWO HOUR LUNCH, though...

Maybe I'm just spoiled? Maybe Mom spends too much time with me, and I resent the times she's not here? Or maybe I need a SISTER??? SUBJECT FOR A NEW POLL!!!

Photo by Ryan Van Lenning. Many thanks for not making me share a photo of my OWN bald patooty!

Day 62: Happy Two Month Anniversary!

Our "Happy" Anniversary begain at 3am this morning. That's when the Mom woke up to begin her worrying about the factory, the weather, the hot spot (non weather related) and.. well, me.

I fought the need for either worry or celebration until about 530am, when I reluctantly agreed to go outside, but steadfastly refused to do any businesses... A tasty and celebratory breakfast was presented to me shortly thereafter, along about the time the monsoons began to pass over the back yard.

Ain't lying... I was doin' the p-p dance. Interpret that however you want, because it applies to both numbers. I was tempted to do it indoors, because of the misery of it all, but I just couldn't.

One super great thing about my new Mom is... her patience, and her resoluteness. I'm guessing she and I went out fifteen times between 5am and 7am... just because she wanted me to do some business. I was reluctant at the time, but I'm grateful not to be holding it now (cortisone shot and all...).

Happy Anniversary to Us! She's coming home for lunch, and I'm planning a BIG surprise!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Day 61: Another GRR(H)eat Story!

Mom says I'm her special boy. And maybe for the first time in my life... I believe that's true.

The thing is... there are so many
special golden boys and girls out there. And there are special Moms, like the one I have... think about it, you might be one, too!

Watch Nikki's story, while considering this... Goldens Reward...

Rescues heal!

Monday, August 18, 2008

Day 60: Good and Golden Fortune

Me and Mom spent the last coupla days feelin' a iota bummed on a count of the belly up trolley and all the fun things we missed on a count of it.

But today we heard that, while we were here lickin' our super-fishull wounds... my Cousins Zeke and Rizzo, Aunt Karen and Uncle Craig had a trolley crash on the way to the beach.

Thank Heavens...!!! Noone was hurt, and they were all
rescued from the big fast road by Uncle Tom and Aunt Madison!

So I'm pawsin' to reflect on what good and golden fortune is not... and is.

It's NOT that your trolley is without cool airs. It IS that you have loved ones like Aunt Susan to rescue you from a hot day on the road!

It's NOT an OW-WEE and a bald butt. It IS that you have a Mom that worries and cares. And an Aunt Susan who delivers brown bag treats to prevent more!

It's NOT the fact that you missed adventures you were so looking forward to, but it IS living in a home full of mutual care, adoration and respect, with a Mom that makes every day special in some way...

It's NOT that your trolley is banged up, and you are stranded. What it IS IS... you are safe and without physical harm. And equally important IS having friends you call family, like Aunt Madison and Uncle Tom, who rescue you!

And base and bottom line... It's NOT Chapter One. It IS having
GRRH believe in you... provide you an awesome ride to H-Town, proper representation and excellent match-making!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Day 59: Random Thoughts

Things I THINK I love:
  1. Trips to Galveston.
  2. Walks on the beach.
  3. Board Meetings.

Things I KNOW I love:

  1. Oodles of loving. (Mom's guilt ROCKS!).
  2. Bacon and eggs.
  3. Aunt Susan's "treats".
  4. Muncho chasers.
  5. Squirrel chasings.
  6. Brushings.
  7. Mid-Afternoon Stories.

Things I DON'T Like So Much:

  1. Chores. Especially of the Dyson nature.
  2. Moonlight work (Mom's), though I'm grateful for the benefits.
  3. The storm defender cape. I've personally sent mixed messages as to whether it works. But do I like wearing it? Not so much, but I've also got a gargantuan bo-bo on my butt!
  4. Windmills... and warm temperatures on both sides of the door. (Windmill people presented Mom with a bill for $531! Not much market for a PPV dog blog, past my prime for centerfolds, and I ain't deliverin' newspapers, so...)

Things I HAVE TO Get Used To:

  1. Mom's thrill (not) over windmill bills.
  2. Warm temperatures on both sides of the door.

Things I HATE With A Passion:

  1. STORMS.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Day 58: Random Thoughts

Things I love:
  1. Big and happy plans for a Saturday!
  2. Visiting with the teller in the bank drive-thru!
  3. Coffee and pound cake on the Starbucks patio!
  4. Promised destinations reached! Even if it means a baff!
  5. Air conditioning in trolleys!!! This cannot be understated!!!
  6. Cape and cone free weekends!
  7. Aunt Susan aka Sammy's Mom for rescuing MY Mom. And for delivering healthy and tasty treats to help my hind side heal!

Things I don't like so much:

  1. Hopes dashed. Plans cancelled.
  2. Loud explosions in the trolley. Hot air blowing from her vents.
  3. Did I mention hot air blowing from the trolley vents?
  5. Capes and cones. And a nervous, distracted Mom.
  6. Going to bed when it's still daylight. Gonna be a good boy, though, 'cause Mom's stressed!
  7. The proverbial dark cloud over mine and Mom's head.

Day 58: The Trolley


And the trolley is belly up (but not in a good way).

Thursday, August 14, 2008




Day 56: OOPS! I did it again...

Heard the garage door going up at noon today. Knew it was the Mom coming home to check on my "itty bitty" hot bobo.

Did the only thing any macho self respecting boy would do, after spending the morning chewing on his own hip...

I hid in the baffroom.

Think, think, think... I said to myself. She's gonna find me. She's gonna ask.

I did. She did and she did.

My answer: "A bear bit me!"

The Mom's reply: "Where's the bear?!"

My answer: "It was a bit and run."

I'm not sure she bought it, but phone calls were made, and it seems that she's taking the rest of the day off to take me for a trolley ride. Guessin' Doc Banks will be at the halfway point of the trip.
Fun image courtesy of, promoting the 2007 Spring Fig Leaf 5K run (the only clothing optional 5k Run in Georgia!).

Tuesday, August 12, 2008



On the one paw, it would be super cool to have a sister to hang out with, specially when the Mom's away. We could also run 'round the yard together and join forces to destroy the evil squirrel empire!

On the other paw, I'm not so sure I'm ready to share. I mean, I like that the Mom is all mine. I like bein wherever I want to be, and I consider the entire house and yard reserved by me.

Affection been generous 'round here. Taken some getting used to, on a counta my past, but we've stablished some patterns that make me feel stable. Not quite sure I'm ready for apple cart turnover...

And then there's the toys... I never had a lot of stuff before. It took some getting used to, but... I really LIKE having stuff. I like toting it, rearranging it and never having it taken away. It's a good feeling, really. Really!

The Mom's concerned about how I feel... but I'm concerned about her, too. Ain't gonna lie. Betwixt her worrying about my emotions, poop, bobos, general health and well being, weather radar and thunderstorms, getting herself enrolled in oh-bedience training... AND the factory, I gotta wonder...


Gonna nibble my hiney and think about it for a while...

Really cute graphic courtesy of Serendipity Pet Shop, a most excellent place to shop for gifts... and the Mom has a birfday coming up!!!

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Day 51: Cousins Zeke and Rizzo

As Mom left this morning, she said she had to go talk to some folks about designing them a new porch.

She came home smelling like my Cousins Zeke and Rizzo.

I can only de-duce that Aunt Karen is getting a new porch!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Day 49: Random Thoughts

Some days, ain't much happening. And trust me, I count these lazy days of my second life as golden moments! Good time to just sit 'round, scratch what itches and let your mind wander...

GRRH COOKIES are good!!! Aunt Elaine ROCKS the oven, ya'all!
2. Squirrels can jump 4 real! Come on... from the oak tree to the top of the hot tub gazebo to the roof of the house to the pecan tree? Wow. I need to work out... maybe even a membership to Goldens Gym???!!
3. Uncle Tom gave me a bye for a "you know what". That's our secret code for 'baff'. (Don't tell the Mom).
4. Glad I'm employed in the fields of hospitality, entertainment & security. I don't think factory work is all that much fun.
5. I KNOW I can dance! And Uncle Stevey gonna teach me all his tricks!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Day 48: Log and A Firefly On The Big Bed

The Bid Bed... Been invited on it. Hopped on it. Sought refuge from a storm on it. Climbed on it. Napped on it... briefly. Watched tv on it. Watched Mom reading a book on it.

And last night, after I was invited on it and rejected the offer... well, Lulu changed his mind. My pee-rogative, ya know. Lights went out and before even I knew it... I hopped and plopped before drowsy Mom could overrule!

Slept all night long up there by Mom on what you call a temper-pee-dic. Gotta say, I might notta really thought out this 'just happy to be sleepin indoors thing' as the big bed feels better than I imagined on the big bones.

Gotta also tell ya... we slept like a log and its firefly, me definitely being the log... with the attentive and firefly Mom. Log don't much care about the firefly, but still...

Ever good sit-chee-ashun got its good points and bad. And in the case of the big bed, the mom is both. On the one paw, she's great to back up to, like a really soft pillow. But she's also an oven, so ever so often you gotta roll over and give her the stiff leg.

And ever time I moved so much as a whisker, she was flittin' round like a firefly, checkin' on me. Had to remind myself from time to time that that's what love must feel like... otherwise it would be downright annoyin'.

Funny thing is... today, I feel like a firefly... Mom, a log.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Day 47: Edouard, Upper and Lower Lake Comet

Heard the stories, and now I've seen it for myself.

Upper (right) and Lower (right Lake Comet:

I'm guessing you gotta be pretty special to have stuff named after you. Huge pawprints she left. Mom says mine are just as big... just different, and I too will have stuff named after me.

I put some thought into that, and I like... Luke's Laps. There's two of em.

One is the tracks I make through the yard, speeds ranging from a slow sniffing amble to an excess of 90mph! And the second Luke's Lap is the place Mom makes when she sits down. It's my favorite place to put my head, and I like to think of it as my own, hence the name... Luke's Lap.

Day 47: A Golden Retriever's Thoughts On Tropical Storms

Edouard (I don't think that's how Uncle Tom spells it) hit today. OK, it was more like a gentle brush against your tail as your wagging it... It got a little wet around here, and seeing as how I'm not exactly into that downfalling water (more of whatcha might call a drinker myself)... I had a good bit of time to think:

1. Pretty much anything that keeps Mom home with me all day ranks four paws belly up!
2. The fact that the trolley is blocked in by the BBQ pit means she can't make a fast escape.
3. Lawn furniture in the house means an obstacle course to the door.
4. Potted plants in the house is a temptation. But no, I didn't.
5. What they need is a weather dog that actually tells the weather. A bit of wind, a lot of rain, but... NO THUNDER, and that's what counts.
6. Puddles are fun to chase skwirls through... slows em down.
7. Racing through standing water should be a substitute and not a reason for a baff!

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Day 44: A.B. (After Baff)

Had a brief run-in with an air gun, but was able to convince Mom that real men don't blow their hair dry...

Instead, they crawl up in their Mama's lap to get towel dried and brushed.

That's how Cool Hand rolls...

My idea of blowing my hair dry is running about two dozen figure 8's at lightning (I know, I can't believe the analogy either) speed!

Here's Mom's best shot at trying to capture the moment. Can someone show her how to use the action sport setting on the FooGee?

Settled down and rested a bit while Mom cleaned up the mess.

Dam, I'm pretty... errrr RUGGEDLY HANDSOME!

Day 44: My First Baff

The Mom, hopped up on iced tea... and guess what happened to me?! I thought at first that we were taking a swim, and I hopped in, willingly. But then the tides turned, and out came the suds...

But actually, the baff I dreaded... wasn't so bad. I know there's things you gotta answer to at the Pearly Gates, and I'm hoping the subject of my first baff here comes up... 'cause today was proof I'm a good boy!

Ain't gonna line up for another one, ya understand... but wif Mom rubbin' on me and all, wadn't bad overall.

Tastes good, too!

Day 44: The Deal

Mom went to First Saturday at Orvis this morning, but I didn't mind, because Aunt Karen and I struck a deal.

She promised to make sure Mom wouldn't come home with a sister (ain't ready to share the Mom).

And I promised to make sure I had a cold bear ready for her. I assumed that meant polar. It took some googling and ebaying, but I was ready for her.

Aunt Karen fulfilled her end of the deal. Mom came home smelling like
jasmine, but she came home alone. But judging by the look on Mom's face, I'm thinking I might have read Aunt Karen's email wrong...

It was too late, anyway... the Mom is hopped up on iced tea!

Friday, August 1, 2008

Day 43: Bigger Than a Food Bowl

Mom came home with this thing today.

What is it?... And what does it mean to me?

Too big for a toy. Too big for the living room.

Looks like a bowl. I wish! Too big.

Could be a pool.
Wrong shape.

Gonna keep my eye on it.